Do you remember how optimistic we were at the beginning of 2020? We had slogans in our minds about it being the best year ever, having a clear vision, and how goals were going to be met and exceeded during this year with that magical number of 2020! Yeah, that was a good day...
2020 began on the brink of nuclear war with Iran, the deaths of beloved celebrities, and a tiny virus in China that would forever change all of our lives in one way or another. Since then we've seen the stock market rise, fall, and emerge again like a Phoenix. Every city in the nation has experienced some sort of lock-down or quarantine. Riots have broken out in our streets and protests have shut down entire cities for months. You and I have witnessed an election season unrivaled in its polarization and hatred, an election that over a month later is still being contested. I pray 2020 goes out with a whimper.
Personally, it didn't start out well. Like many others I fell into the trap of simply doing nothing. There were plenty of memes out there that described our mentalities - "You'll either come out of this pandemic a hunk, a drunk, or a chunk." I fell into the last two categories personally and professionally, at least during the beginning of the year. Yet with all of this, I am extremely thankful for the year 2020.
So what do I have to be thankful for during 2020? Why do I in fact consider 2020 to be one of the best years of my life? Here are just a few of the things that 2020 has done for me. This year has caused me to take a good look at the man in the mirror and decide whether I like him or not. I decided that I didn't like him or who he was becoming. I knew he had more in him than he cared to admit. I knew he wasn't living his best life but rather he was simply coasting through life hoping good things would happen to him.
I became extremely honest with myself in 2020 and decided it was time for some changes. I decided it was time for a college degree. This may come as a shock to many but I never finished college. In interviews for jobs I never lied; they simply asked the wrong questions - Where did you go to school? What did you study? What did you major in? There was never direct question of a degree or credentials. I wasn't even exercising mental reservation. I didn't put much stock in a degree so didn't think it was important to mention I didn't have one. I'm now enrolled in a Health Information Management program to get an RHIT (Registered Health Information Technician) certification and then on to a Bachelors degree for the RHIA (Registered Health Information Administrator) certification. I just finished the first semester with a 4.0 and my kids think I'm crazy because I'm so intense about studying and getting perfect grades but hopefully it's good example that age is just a number and hard work pays off.
What I'm sharing here comes after listening to the book
Can't Hurt Me by David Goggins (
please be advised of the language used in this books as it may be offensive to some). This book cut me to the core, wiped away the facade that I presented to others as well as the b.s. I've been feeding myself for decades. I have bookshelves full of books, my Audible bookcase has 242 books in it and this, by far, is the best book I have ever listened to in the area of personal change and development.
After a lot of self-reflection and being very hard with myself I found a theme for my life. I gave that theme an acronym - Y.A.A.Q (You Are A Quitter). Ouch! From little league, to Boy Scouts, to college, to jobs, to dreams I have constantly fluctuated between big dreams and quitting. I claim to be an "idea man" and I let others do the work. Nope, I just quit. I don't put in the hard work, the extra reps or the extra mile. I quit and I find someone to blame for the failure, never myself. My parents, wife, children, co-workers, customers, clients, friends, enemies, God, mother nature, aliens, and the government were the cause of my woes. What a load of crap. Now that I think of it, I've been a pretty good salesman my whole life...I've sold myself everyone of those cheap lies; I bought them and they cost me a fortune in so many ways.
2020 has helped me change that acronym to (You Aren't A Quitter). I've begun to care for myself more and be aware of my physical, mental, and emotional states. I've always struggled with anxiety and depression. In 2018 I began to seek professional help for the situation. My doctor prescribed a medication that was like a miracle drug for me. This year, being surrounded by a flood of health information, both in class and on the news, I realized that to be truly healthy the medication was not enough. I needed a plan for my life. This plan had to include regular exercise, a healthy diet, study, meditation, and more.
After reading
Goggins' book I came up with a simple plan that would challenge me and keep me focused. I considered the things I wanted to work on, get rid of, and grow in. Here are the categories and how I am focusing on them currently (this will change as levels are reached)
- Physical - Walk 3.5 miles per day, Body Weight Exercises, Yoga for stretching and flexibility, reduce alcohol consumption
- Mental - Read/Listen for one hour, Spend at least one hour per day on course work, learn Spanish
- Spiritual - Read daily scripture readings each day, spend time in quiet prayer/meditation
- Emotional - Review mental state throughout the day striving for calm/peaceful no matter the situation
Knowing how easily I get off track I devised a system to help me stay focused on my goals. It consists of a
printed spread sheet which lists my goals each day for two weeks at a time. In addition, I wear a
bracelet on my left hand throughout the day reminding me to focus on those goals. If I happen to miss one of the items, I have to take the bracelet off until I complete the entire list the next day. It's a physical reminder, both in its presence and absence, of where my focus needs to be. I've also shared this system with my wife so if she sees me without the bracelet she can ask me what's going on. I've also shared it with you for the same reason. Ya'll are now part of my accountability team!
I've learned in my Anatomy and Physiology class that are Autonomic Nervous System is an amazing part of the human body. It, in part, controls what we call the "flight of fight" response to stimulus. Part of our flight or fight response is to block out all the peripheral stimulus, all the stuff that isn't really important. Our pulse heightens, our digestion slows, blood is channeled to major muscle groups, our senses are are more focused, we can even get tunnel vision only focusing on what is directly in front of us; we focus on what we need to be aware of to survive.
That's what 2020 has done for me. It's wiped out the fluff and narrowed my focus on what's important. It's truly given me hindsight and I'm thankful for that. How about you? What has 2020 done for you?
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