Me: O Lord, you know that I love you. Show me your Will, reveal to me Your plan for my life. I am
now 50 years old and I am still unsure of what it is that You want me to do in this life. What is Your plan? How should I fulfill it? Will I know it when I see it? Will You give me a sign? Is it to be recognized by others or shall it be hidden? What, O Heavenly Father, is your plan for my life?
God: My plan is for you to be happy in this life and happy forever with Me in Heaven!
Me:...
God: What?
Me: I know that part! But what specifically do you want me to do in this life?
God: Be happy, love me, love others, be loved.
Me: Okay, look, I see what you are doing but I'm tired of this same old conversation. So, what specifically do you want me to do? Should I be a farmer? A husband? A deacon? Should I try to write books or tutor children? Should I get a Masters Degree? Do you want me to dedicate my life to helping the homeless? Do you care if I open a brewery? Should I work for a non-profit or aim towards a CEO role? Could I be a doctor at my age? Do you want me to work from home or be a motivational speaker??? What, specifically, do you want me to do.
God: What do you want to do?
Me: Your Will!!!
God: My Will is for you to love and be loved, make others happy and be happy.
Me: (sigh) How many times have we had this conversation over the past 20 years?
God: Well into the hundreds I'm sure.
Me: Right, and I'm tired of it. I just want to know! Why won't you just come out and tell me!!?
God: Wait, do you think I'm trying to hide something from you?
Me: It soooo very much feels like it.
God:
That sounds sooo familiar.Me: What do you mean?
God: (mocking the serpent with dripping sarcasm) "Did God reallllly sssay that you ssshouldn't eat of the fruit? Oh, jussst from that one tree? I wonder why? Do you think he'sss hiding sssomething from you? I bet he isss, in fact, truth be told, he knowsss that when you eat of it, you'll be just like Him,
knowing good and evil."
Me: That was pretty good.
God: Thanks, lots of practice.
Me: So there's no master plan? No specific job or role?
God: Nope. I made you for happiness not for a job.
Me: So I can do whatever I want?
God: Sort of, within the guidelines of course.
Me: So all of this time I've been waiting for the big reveal of what it is that I'm supposed to do in this life and in reality, there won't be a big reveal?
God: Do you know people who received at "big reveal?"
Me: Well, no, not really. A lot of people say they were "born for this" or "made to do that" etc.
God: Oh, yeah that. They're just 100% in on what it is their doing but they could have made other choices and been happy doing something else as well.
Me: I've wasted a lot of time.
God: Not really, you've been exploring the world, looking at options, seeing the beauty of creation and where beauty is lacking, where there is love and where it is lacking. Maybe you can fill those lacking areas.
Me: Is that what you want me to do?
God: Nice try.
Me: Why have I always thought that there was some specific plan you had for me? I've spent so many anxious years afraid that I would miss out on my role or never discover it.
God: Have you ever read Jeremiah 29?
Me: Yeah, sure.
God: Really? You know who you are talking to right?
Me: Sorry, I probably have but I don't see where this is going.
God: It's the chapter most people quote when they are facing a difficult time in their life. Most specifically they quote verse 11, "For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." It's comforting to many; letting the disciple know that I have a plan. However, it ignores the rest of the chapter. In that chapter Jeremiah writes to the chosen people who have been carried into exile. They are in exile, in captivity, and what do I instruct Jeremiah to say to them?
Me: That you will rescue them.
God: I mention that, but it won't be anytime soon. No, I tell them to build houses, plant gardens, get married, have children and grandchildren. I tell them to seek the welfare and provide for the welfare of the place they are living. There's no master plan for them collectively or alone. I want them to live life, be happy, be faithful, and love one another until I bring them back to the Promised Land.
Me: Wait, so we're in exile here on earth and you want us to live life until it's time to return to Heaven. Right?
God: Bingo! Sorry, it's a Catholic thing.
Me:
God: What? Why does no one except Chesterton think I have a sense of humor. I created seahorses and duckbilled platypus' for St. Peter's sake!
Me: True. Anyway, so, there's no "will for my life" other than to be happy, love, and be loved?
God: You got it, within the guardrails of course. Don't forget, the original plan was for this place to be a paradise. It still retains much of that even if it's been twisted somewhat. Oh, and the punishment was to bring forth food by the sweat of the brow, not chain yourself to a plan for the short time you are in exile.
Me: This is actually pretty freeing now that I think about it.
God: Think of it this way. Do you support your children? Do you want what's best for them? Do you want them to flourish and excel with their gifts and talents?
Me: Yes, of course, that's part of the joy of such diverse personalities!
God: Do you have a plan for each one of them laid out? Do you have a plan with goals and markers? If they reach these, would they earn your love and trust?
Me: Of course not, I love them and want them to make their own way, be happy....love....and be loved...
God: (smiles)
Me: Within the guidelines.
God: (still smiling)...of course...
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